THE CAIMAN
As Mao says: "The worId is yours, as welI as ours,
but in the end, it is yours".
We Marxist-Leninists favor a simple life- StyIe.
Even the party Ieaders shouId Iive Iike the workers.
And when the sons of the rich come to us,
with their Iong hair and mod cIothes,
we tell them: "lf you want to work for the party,
you must give the party aIl your money.
Otherwise, there is no trust."
Our organization must buiId the truIy revoIutionary party,
destroying the revisionist clique of the CP and the unions
who have sold out the Italian people
to the bourgeoisie and its government.
This revolutionary couple celebrating its union
wilI fight against all economist deviance
and intelIectuaIism which preaches absurdities
like struggIe in the...
Fabrizia!
My name is not Fabrizia.
It is Aidra.
The poIice! l'm trapped!
Surround the buiIding!
Freeze!
CATARACTS
Ladies and gentIemen, good evening!
We'Il now hear how these great little fiIms came to be.
Straight from the lips
of the man who produced them.
Our speciaI guest tonight: Bruno Bonomo!
- Can I give you this script? - After.
No, I've got to go now.
- "The Caiman", I'Il read it quietly. - Not too quietIy!
Bonomo, the man who revived genre movies in ltaIy
years before Quentin Tarantino
with films Iike: "Moccasin Assassins",
"Smutty Boots", "Maciste versus Freud"
and the film Bruno watched with us tonight: "Cataracts".
A fiIm that ruined him.
His house repossessed, his company bankrupt...
My production company is stiIl...
Come now, you never made another fiIm.
Your director became an optician...
l beIieved in it, l thought it'd be a hit.
lt was a disaster.
And l say that, not out of crueIty,
but to make up for the exile you suffered.
We've missed you these ten years. What are you doing?
l'm preparing a fiIm.
You telI me like that? Out of the bIue!
I'm glad, but a IittIe vexed. You dark horse!
What film are you making?
A period piece about Columbus returning from America.
- Directed by? - Franco Caspio.
This man is bIitzing us with emotion!
Three major come-backs:
25 years for Caspio, 10 for Bonomo, 500 for CoIumbus!
SoIved it! No need to make a real one.
That's a modeI my grandson made.
My compIiments, he's grasped the spirit of cinema.
We'lI use this.
Luckily, CoIumbus onIy returned with one, the...
The Nina.
We'lI pop it into our pooI and you'lI see.
That's how they made "Ocean of Fear".
- Remember that? - No.
But Bruno, l'm not used to shooting like that.
- You're not used to shooting at alI. - You neither!
Don't worry, you'lI have everything you need.
I was wondering what I'd bring tonight.
Yes it's early, but l wanted to get ahead.
Think I can make a movie with a toy Iike this?
We shoot it aIl with that.
l can bring dessert.
Our set designer is Fritz Simmons.
But he's an alcoholic!
He's stopped drinking.
Some crew... For a year, it's been just you and me.
Thursday, after l sign with RAl we'lI discuss the crew.
You could at least have given me an assistant!
Come Thursday, you'Il have assistants, sets, wardrobe, the lot.
Yesterday, at Dino Risi's 90th birthday
AureIio de Laurentiis asked me if he couId read the script.
He's heard about it for so long and he's interested.
Dino Risi's birthday?
He no longer invites me.
- Andrea, Iook what Dad found! - No, that's not flat.
No, it's exactly like this 12, but this isn't it.
Been searching for over an hour.
Roberto's dad said you pIayed weIl Saturday.
You never telI me anything.
Sorry, but just heIp me find that piece.
Or I'Il never finish the spaceship.
A yeIlow, flat 12.
How did it go last night?
Good, they screened: "Lady Cop in StiIettos".
- And "Cataracts"? - Of course.
- Was Aidra there too? - No, she can't appear in pubIic.
She's wanted by the police the worId over.
ReaIly? Why is that?
- So, tonight's story... - ls Aidra in it?
Yes, only l can't recalI where we stopped.
At the bit where she'd become a top chef
working in a restaurant.
- Which was calIed? - "Slave of Love"!
In this restaurant kitchen, Aidra is almost unrecognizable.
No one knows her true identity.
ln her new life, she's loved by alI.
AII, except a food critic
who aIways sIates her food.
But one day, this nasty critic
returns to the restaurant to do another article.
A moment she's eagerIy awaited.
"Stuffed escalope SiciIian style, Puerto-Rican risotto,
Rice aIla Piacentina.
Tripe a Ia mode de Zurich,
Stock-pot with apples,
Boiled veal trotters..."
After a while
the first dish arrives.
A fork sinks into the risotto.
The critic barely tastes it
and then caIIs the waiter.
AlI's welI, he tasted it.
He left a bit...
He left it aIl.
How can a restaurant like this
dare rustIe up a Puerto-Rican style risotto
with a juIienne of peppers?
lt needs Spanish oIives!
You and your palates...
should never set foot here again!
Never again!
Bananas a la Copacabana, Scrambled egg stuffed tomatoes!
Chicken alIa SparafuciIe!
l was waiting for you.
l'm not sure about this recipe.
They look aIive...
They are aIive.
lt's you who is dead!
No!
Yes...
PIease forgive me!
I've had sinusitis for 15 years.
I've lost alI sense of taste!
These fiIms were considered Fascist, can you imagine?
- We were Fascists. - No, you weren't!
Don't discredit a job weIl done.
You fought the dictatorship of auteur cinema,
you were the antibodies.
Just two different ways of doing the same job.
Bruno, these people pay weII.
They take everything, even the trailers.
Have you got them?
AlI except "Smutty Boots", it got stolen in Viterbo.
I'Il get it from the Ministry.
- The young want to see your films. - No one asks for them.
We'll do a boxed- Set.
l'II remaster the negatives,
tasty bonuses, an interview with Paola...
Forget it! She doesn't want to hear about cinema.
- Got the censor's cuts? - Never had probIems with the censor.
Yes you did! 500 frames of "Suzy the Woman Hater".
- 15 seconds! - WeII you did go a bit far!
AlI l have are my movies and this studio.
- A piece of cinema history! - Where alI we do is tele- Shopping.
Only they haven't paid in 6 months.
Just a minute.
Marisa, what's going on?
- He says he's Ieaving. - Where?
Wait!
- What are you doing? - Just let me go.
I've cIinched it, we're meeting RAI!
De Laurentiis read the script?
Yes, and he Iikes it.
Since he bought NapIes F.C. aIl he thinks of is footbalI.
Peppe too, he reckons that...
- Tell him! - Together, you can stiII amaze.
You shut your mouth!
l remember what you wrote about me:
"The vioIent use of supersonic zoom
reminds one of home-movies."
- You wrote that! - 30 years ago.
- l've not forgotten! - What a memory!
Come now, don't go.
- Give me the box. - Forget it.
Let go!
No one wanted you, I was the only one to trust you!
Give that to me!
What do you want with it?
You'll break it!
I never want to see you again.
Never again!
Come back here right now!
Franco!
Andrea, keep your eye on the match.
Ref! I'm making substitutions.
Emanuele and GianIuca,
Giuseppe and Nicolas.
You stay there.
Coach!
I know Andrea's not great, but l feeI he's progressed.
Sure, but that's not important.
Even Roberto's dad said he played weIl.
Don't worry, I'Il bring him on.
WiIl you put him up front or in defence?
I feel he's better as a defender.
Dad, please!
Have no worries.
I don't want to interfere in your tactical choices,
but have you seen the number 16?
Sure he was born in '96? He looks bigger.
They're aIl the same age.
Well, I'Il just sit and watch.
l'm counting on you!
Aidra doesn't know what to do.
She's been underwater for seven minutes,
pursued by four men with knives between their teeth.
Suddenly, Aidra...
has an idea.
What was her idea?
Me, disturb their sleep?
WeIl if Andrea dragged me to see "Men in BIack" 1 and 2, "Matrix",
"Mystery of the TempIars", "The IncredibIe HuIk",
fulI of expIosions, killing and worms...
The fact is, you don't want them to see you in "Cataracts".
OnIy I'd like them to know
that their parents did something together.
The kids know something is amiss.
Quit teIIing me the kids "know". They don't!
l toId them I'm not sIeeping here as l'm filming by night
and they believed me.
We're separating, we have to taIk to them.
It's not a real separation, we said we'd think it over.
Maybe things will improve between us.
We seem to be getting along better.
Why do you say they know?
Have they said something?
No, it's just that...
Andrea wakes up crying almost every night
because he's Iost a tiny piece of some toy.
He says it's what he cherishes most in aIl the worId.
So he screams, saying we have to find it.
We switch on the light,
then Giacomo wakes and he cries too.
Sometimes, even l cry.
And it's hours before we get back to sIeep.
I've got to go...
I'm expecting something.
"Thousands of banknotes swirling around.
BiIlions of Iire from the 70s. Where has it aIl come from?
BiIlions and bilIions and bilIions of lire.
All this money, faIIen from heaven.
Where has it come from?
AIl this money...
From where?"
Sorry to calI so late.
CouId l speak to Teresa Mantero?
This is Bruno Bonomo.
l have a script here: "The Caiman"...
with your phone number...
You were the girI with the baby?
Right, I remember.
But why did you give this script to me?
l see, l was Iast on the Iist.
Of course I've read it.
Yes, interesting.
But I'd rather not discuss it over the phone.
Perhaps we couId meet...
Fine, Iet's caII each other.
Goodnight, Teresa.
Morning, Marisa.
- How are you? - Fine. What's new?
l was wondering what to do about today's meeting with RAl
for "The Return of Columbus".
We'll see.
- Did Franco Caspio caII? - No.
The bank calIed, we're overdrawn by 40,000 euros.
They suggested staggered repayment. What's that?
No caIls, I've a script to read.
Except my wife, put her through.
Scene 6, exterior, day.
We are in Milan, in the early 1970s,
for the inauguration of the buiIding work.
l want to buiId a quarter which inspires optimism.
Pessimists can do no good in life.
One, two, three!
I want to build a town which has everything.
The birth clinic, the school, the work place,
cable TV speciaIly for housewives.
This project is costing 500 milIion a day.
Might we know who gave it to you?
All this money, where does it reaIly come from?
l'd rather not answer that right now.
ln fact, not ever.
Waiting for me?
Yes, we wanted to ask you
as administrator of EdilmiIano...
You've misunderstood, I'm just a consuItant,
responsibIe for general running.
We inquired into the provenance of your money
which is managed by 22 secret holdings.
l have no secrets, and anyway these holdings don't belong to me.
No, they belong to nominees,
housewives, pensioners, even a poor stroke victim.
But we know it's all yours.
Just one thing we don't know: where did it aII come from?
Don't disappoint me. Don't you ask that question too!
You're smart, too smart for the job you're in.
- Did PaoIa caIl? - No.
Nor Franco Caspio?
Two years of coIIaboration and not even a calI!
lf any friends calI, put them through.
Even strangers, put them through, l want to be disturbed!
When did you last see a helicopter in an ltaIian movie?
lt's an action film!
Suitcases fuIl of cash, bids for power...
All this money, where does it come from?
A mogul who'd build an entire city.
- And Columbus? - Too sad!
He returns with a single Caravel.
There's no audience for period films.
But this is a film of today.
- Caspio is still directing? - No.
She's a young, taIented director.
You just switch the first contract advance
from "Columbus" to "The Caiman".
Bruno, it's not that easy.
But this wiIl cost a Iot less. Savings alI round!
Sure, but it's a totaIly different fiIm.
- And this girI's an unknown! - I know her.
Just read the script.
- Not that again! - I want to work here!
Shut up!
I'm trying to help you here, can't you cooperate!
What should Plop do? l don't get it.
Plop is a bird who falIs from a tree.
A man or an animaI passes by and mistakes him for something.
What do they mistake him for?
Ok, the bird falIen from the nest Iooks Iike...
- I'm off. - Be home late? You're so pretty!
Prettier than usual.
Why do you rehearse evenings?
Because the conductor is busy during the day.
- In ten minutes, you stop the fiIm. - So soon?
- It's a nice film. - Then watch it aII.
- As usual, we just give in. - He asked when you'd be home.
When l get home, you'Il be asIeep.
- WilI you wake me? - Yes.
- Got to ask you something. - It's a bit late.
- What could PIop be mistaken for? - I don't know!
- Nice jacket! - lt's new.
So, what are you singing for the concert?
Cantatas by HandeI. First, a Baroque concert, then us.
PIop is afraid of the dark, that might be the soIution.
It's not a riddIe, it's to deveIop the imagination.
So we have to invent...
- So, are you happy? - ReaIIy happy.
I sent the script to lots of producers,
yet they didn't even call to say they didn't Iike it.
And now, to think that, RAl...
Just doing my job.
So, how did you present the project?
See this?
The Iast ltaIian pirate movie was shot entirely here.
The subject might be a bit much for them.
"Blackband's Last Words", ever heard of it?
- What fiIms of mine do you know? - Just "Cataracts".
- So? - lt's not realIy my genre, but...
- But it's funny? - Yes, some scenes...
What exactIy did you teIl those TV guys?
Let me show you how we used to make movies.
What did you telI them?
This is a saloon, made by an exceIlent set designer.
I'll introduce you, couId use him for your fiIm.
We were shooting two movies simuItaneously:
"Bloody VigiIs for Sheriff Clark"
and "The Revenge of the WiId Witches".
One by day, the other by night.
What did I telI them about "The Caiman"?
From the very start, I knew they were interested.
At last, an ambitious, solid film.
We'lI see what they think of the script.
I expIained the story, but I got a bit lost at the end.
- Yes, the end may need... - No, it was my fault.
While talking, l lost the pIot.
Because, in fact, I hadn't read it alI.
- You hadn't read it? - l read it like that...
DiagonalIy.
l skimmed it, right now I just can't focus.
I've a Iot of probIems, personal too...
- What are you saying? - l'm taking Omega 3s!
Teresa, I didn't read the script.
Don't worry, it'Il work out fine.
How could you present it to the TV not having read it!
What are we going to teIl them?
Don't worry.
I go on gut feeling, this fiIm has it alI.
Action, atmosphere...
It's there, let's go for it!
I just got stuck with the money-runners.
It's compIicated, l couldn't figure it!
Let's go back to the start. You remember Cesari?
Cesari, the inIand revenue officer
who discovered the Caiman's sIush funds
has now become his right-hand man.
Into the Caiman's newly buiIt quarter
drives a black car.
From a safe, Cesari takes biIlions in state bonds
which are taken to a bank in the RepubIic of San Marino,
where they are converted into cash.
This cash is brought to MiIan
and kept in a secret apartment.
This is where the money-runners come in.
These guys specialise in taking money abroad.
They each take 500 miIlion Iire,
cross the border
and Iodge it in a secret Swiss bank account.
What was this money
in these Swiss bank accounts used for?
The defendant is charged with having used it
for ilIicit party financing,
to bribe judges for favorabIe verdicts
and tax evasion.
By now it's clear that the Caiman is based on BerIusconi.
What an idiot! But of course!
The heIicopters, the stadium, the tax inspectors...
And I hadn't twigged!
He's taIking to you.
- What? - Look what you've done.
Me make a Iefty politicaI fiIm? l hated them 30 years ago!
What did you think it was: "Cataracts 2"?
lt took me ten years to win favor with RAl!
- The knock-for-knock! - The what?
- The knock-for-knock! - Sorry?
The knock-for-knock declaration!
Hand me that thing...
The banks won't give me a cent, they're taking the studios!
I told them it was an action movie,
and now l teIl them we're doing a film on Berlusconi.
- l even voted for him! - And you admit it?
Beat it! CIear the street!
A man who gets rich overnight, who has three TV channeIs,
who becomes Prime Minister due to debts and trials.
That's not a film, it's public knowledge.
Bruno, where do you fit in?
It's a film I want to do, a film I beIieve in.
lt's a fiIm peopIe are waiting for.
People are waiting for this?
lt's a delicate topic for a novice.
Start with something more personaI.
One feeIs this film is not born of urgent need.
WeII, l feel it is urgent to make this film.
But it's too easy to make ideoIogicaI films.
ldeologicaI? You misunderstand.
We don't just fixate on Berlusconi... That's obsession!
And the film doesn't go into everything...
Like the Iinks between Berlusconi, DelI'Utri and the Mafia.
I don't understand, in what sense?
Is that in the script? So why talk about it!
"The Caiman" is a broader movie, about power, about ltaIy.
And the Italy of the last 30 years, is BerIusconi.
These young peopIe!
So set in their opinions.
Maybe you'd like to see a second draft of the script?
I can bring in an experienced screenwriter,
even someone of your choice.
Sorry, but we're not interested.
l reaIly want to make this fiIm.
It's crazy that in Italy, no one's ever made a film on BerIusconi.
ln America, about their President,
they make political fiIms, comedies,
thriIIers, love stories.
Here, they're scared to. Money is just an excuse.
Money does count, and how!
I'd like a tub to go, for the kids.
- How far is your home? - Ten, fifteen minutes.
Then, no!
The ice-cream onIy lasts five minutes in the tub.
Any Ionger, it's ruined.
Then l'lI take the tub,
get in the car and drive like mad.
And if I happen to smash into a tree it means I didn't make it on time!
Once out of the freezer, you have to eat it alI, or...
Its structure is modified.
I know!
- Because our ice-cream... - ...is different!
l know it's different, but enough is enough!
Why does everyone have it in for me today!
You'll bloody kilI me!
Giacomo, are you ok?
I was reading Mickey Mouse.
Guess where Dad is.
- In BoIogna. - No, in La...
In Lapland.
A Iand of lakes and forests, where the sun never sets.
- What does that mean? - lt never gets dark.
- You never sIeep? - Yes, with a mask, Iike Zorro.
Good night, kiss Mom for me.
You'Il kiss her?
So, you prefer State television?
With two grey, identical channels
and programs which end at 11 at night?
FulIy dressed dancers, is that what you want?
They tried to stop us, to take us off the air,
but we prevented them.
And l've not done this for me, but for you,
because you've waited so long for it.
So, let us begin!
You are obsessed with me, l filI your thoughts.
- You think of nothing eIse. - I Iike to write iII of you.
And l'lI continue, even if you've bought my newspaper.
l am a IiberaI publisher, you can write what you like.
But you're wrong. People Iove me, l've answered a need.
These letters, I get thousands daily, alI from women.
They say that since l've given them morning TV too,
their lives have changed.
The judiciary, with its corruption inquiries,
has wiped out a whoIe politicaI cIass.
You must take a stand against the self-promotion of the judges.
They want to change the history of this country. That's not good.
If there were eIections today,
the Ieft would have a crushing majority.
The country cannot afford that.
The country or this company?
Next year, there wilI be a generaI election
and our group wishes to be directly involved.
AIl must lend a hand, our TV channeIs,
our stars, our papers.
Moderates today are mediocre figures, devoid of charisma.
The only soIution is a new poIitical force, headed by me.
You couIdn't care less about moderates.
You're only doing this because you're 5,000 billion in debt
and the judges are closing in on your foreign bank accounts.
You want to enter poIitics,
as otherwise you'Il go to jaiI.
Italy is the country l love.
Here, are my roots, my hopes, my horizons.
Here, I learnt, from my father and from Iife,
my trade of entrepreneur.
Here, l also Iearnt the passion for freedom.
l've chosen to enter the arena to look after the State,
because I do not want to Iive in an illiberal country,
governed by immature forces
and by men bound
to a poIiticalIy and economicaIly disastrous past.
So, what do we do?
- The situation is not good. - So I came to reassure you.
l Ieave messages at the office, you never caIl back,
you're never at home...
- I'm preparing a film. - I've heard that for ten years.
The mortgage guarantee on the studios has Iapsed.
We've heIped you, but you don't meet your repayments.
They want to selI your studios and evict you.
I just need a little time, the film is shaping up.
The fiIm about CoIumbus?
No, another, a winner.
I reread it last night, in one go.
In three months, we're back on track, our problems are over.
I don't know what to say, it's out of my hands.
Seems aIright to me.
There was one IittIe mistake and we corrected it.
- lt's ready? - Not yet.
Ok, I go back, you come and we telI them.
You start and l'lI be right over.
Right, I'Il begin, and then we expIain the situation,
caImIy and quietIy.
Exactly, we'lI start to speak
and you'lI see, the words will come.
They must know we're separating, but we stilI love each other
and them.
Here goes.
It's fine, Iove, not a single mistake.
lt'lI be fine for your teacher, too.
What if she finds a mistake and screams at me?
Everything is perfect.
No, l want to recheck.
l bet I know more bad words than you.
Don't I know it!
l'lI say them aIl, starting with: "Go fu..."
Boys, Dad has something important to teIl you.
Your mom and I...
Be right back.
l can't do it. Can't we put it off?
- Andrea is so up tight... - He aIways is with homework.
Ok, Iet's just have dinner.
And then we'lI see.
Come here.
Pajamas on and into bed.
Who's staying?
We want Dad to teIl us a story.
Ok, I'Il stay.
Tonight, we'Il both stay.
Mom and Dad have something very important to telI you.
What a pretty mom we have! Let's kiss her!
Stop! Are you crazy?
Stop, I beg you!
That's enough, into bed!
Thanks a Iot!
l was saying...
We've something important to telI you, haven't we?
As of tomorrow, Dad wilI live in another house,
a house of his own.
- He'Il no Ionger come every night. - Not Iike before.
Why are you going to Iive in another house?
That way, Mom and l wiII argue less.
lf we argue less, we'lI love each other more
and if we love each other more, we'Il alI be happier.
- We'lI no Ionger sIeep alI together? - ldiot, you just don't get it!
No, we'Il no longer sIeep all together.
But you'lI have two houses,
two bedrooms, other friends...
Can we go on hoIidays together?
We'lI see about the holidays Iater.
I've drawn up a schedule, a budget...
I planned for eight weeks, but I'm not sure that's enough.
l've left a Iot of blanks in the budget,
there are things I need to know.
You have to teIl me when we start, so I can caIl people.
"The Neo-Communists want power without free eIections,
a sick habit that's part of their DNA."
It's important to make this film.
Let's Iaunch a pubIic appeaI for funds.
- Me, l'lI do it for free. - No need for that.
l've always paid peopIe, not much, but...
- What were you saying? - lf you'd seen the budget.
- Solid backing, what have you got? - I'm waiting for answers.
- The costumes go next door? - No, not yet...
- And who's playing the lead? - Better ask Teresa.
- We've decided to do this. - Fritz, my friend.
Teresa wants to reconstruct this section of...
of the Parliament.
We need to call the set builders, and order...
...the materiaIs.
So, what do we do?
- What do we do? - You have to teIl us.
What do we do?
Let's begin.
She's free...
No one can stop her...
She has decided...
to Iove me no more.
- l'd Iike you to pIay the Iead. - Thank you.
l caress her shadow...
Sorry, can't turn it down, I Iike it too much.
Thanks, but a film about BerIusconi, no, honestIy!
- We already know all about him. - From the TV?
Those who want to, know. Those who don't...
There's nothing more to telI, everything's known!
So we do nothing and then he wins again?
He's aIready won.
Twenty, thirty years ago, with his TV channels,
he changed our heads.
And I'm not convinced by the script...
- But you haven't read it! - WeII it's as if l had.
l already know what's in it.
lt's what the leftwing audience wouId Iove to hear.
Berlusconi who messes up his facelift,
but not his hair transpIant, what a laugh!
But that's not my film.
l know, but everybody laughs, even if they shouIdn't.
Anyway, l have another project...
Seems we were mistaken, Bruno. We go back to work?
Now she's vexed, quite a character...
- She's stubborn. - She's taIented.
And a touch unpleasant, that's why I Iike her.
So, l'm writing this comedy movie which I'm realIy into,
a comedy...
You think now's the time to make a comedy?
lt's aIways the time for a comedy!
And off they go...
EUROPEAN PARLlAMENT Mr SchuItz, in ltaIy
a producer is making a film
on the Nazi concentration camps.
l'lI suggest you for the roIe of the Kapo.
She voted for him too.
You'd be perfect.
As welI as Ietting Mr SchuItz speak,
l request that you ask Mr Berlusconi
to withdraw what he just said
in the name of the values that alI we Europeans share.
What I just said, l said with irony.
lf you are incapable of understanding irony,
then I'm sorry.
But l wiIl not withdraw what was said in irony...
He has a very personal notion of irony.
Abroad, we're a Iaughing stock.
It's no Ionger just a confIict of interests.
TeIl me.
So what do I do?
Of course I'm at the office.
But you said you were going.
Yes, I know...
Don't bother, l'lI take care of it.
Problems?
No, I've got to pick up the IittIe one, a mix up.
A misunderstanding, it happens.
Abroad, they cannot understand
how a guy like him
has paralyzed Italy with his personal problems
for twelve years.
For now, that's how it is. See you tomorrow.
ln Italy, the press, but especialIy the TV,
which belong to my group and to my famiIy,
are among our severest critics.
And why?
lt seems you Iack the sun of ltaIy.
You have never been, and you've never switched on,
never switched on, never switched on...
an ltaIian TV set.
lf that is the form of democracy
that you intend to use to siIence
the President of the European CounciI,
then by all means come as tourists to ltaIy,
but here, you seem mere tourists of democracy!
Reading it, you might feel Iike adding things.
There's scope for building this character together,
to rethink it for you, with new ideas...
You hadn't thought of me?
- Bruno, there was another actor? - No, she'd thought of no one else...
If she had, l wouldn't be offended.
No, no one in particuIar.
But perhaps you can bring more humanity to it.
Yes, l like that.
I didn't want to recount the private Iife of the Caiman,
but its public dimension.
From the building of Milan2 to Prime Minister.
So it's reaIly Berlusconi, not just based on him!
ln broad outline...
No, but BerIusconi is a key figure of our times.
Like it or not, maybe the key figure.
It's a film about ltaIy...
It's a nice idea, a nice chaIlenge for an actor.
When Gian Maria... VoIonte pIayed Aldo Moro,
he did a wonderful job.
And that other character... the oil guy...
We need a return to this kind of cinema.
Here's the script...
l'II read it right away. Now l'm curious.
And when... Teresa...
As soon as I've read it, we can meet and talk...
Just a second!
We have to help this girl, she's tenacious.
A fighter, but charming too, with good ideas.
You have...
Honey, where did you get to?
Where are you? Want to come over?
Listen, l'm here with friends.
So, take a taxi.
When you get into the taxi...
remove your panties, without the driver seeing you...
Or rather, Iet him see you, just a IittIe...
No, hoId on, l'm not sure.
Be right back.
Last time, it just didn't happen...
So, on the bedroom ceiIing, I've had them fit
this huge mirror...
That's him: free and easy. Perfect for the role.
Almost sixty and not a wrinkIe.
And what you were saying about
him bringing more humanity to the character...
that's important.
Is he watching?
Say it to me!
He reaIly liked the project,
he's almost agreed.
What a wonderfuI project, a new film together!
- I knew you'd be back one day. - And here I am.
Brought your swimsuit?
- And your wife, stiIl as beautifuI? - More than ever.
- She had taIent too. - She says not.
She's stilI ashamed of that period.
- Tried to change her mind? - Sure I have!
She's returned to her first love, music.
She sings in a choir.
I'm sorry to hear that.
She was reaIly talented!
A pity.
For your chiIdren.
Thank you! You shouIdn't have.
Come now, we worked together for ten years.
When do we meet Pulici?
l'm dying to know him.
Always wanted to do a fiIm with him.
Whenever you Iike, we'II arrange it.
When did we Iast see each other? "Cataracts"?
l toId you that titIe wouldn't work.
Me, I re-edited the fiIm, made a few cuts,
retitled it "Aidra's Men" and in Poland it was a hit.
l knew that fiIm had something.
Why did it go down so badIy?
l was the only one not to lose money on that movie.
The idea of recounting your operetta Italy amuses me.
Keep it down, Jerzy!
I find it reaIIy amusing. You're so ridiculous!
AlI you ltaIians taIk about is TV and Berlusconi.
You are a peopIe half way
between horror and foIkIore.
Don't over do it!
You've grown used to your sleaze.
And each time we think you've touched the bottom...
in fact you haven't.
You continue to dig.
You dig.
You dig...
and you sIip ever deeper.
Ever further down...
you scrape.
We're celebrating?
- Yes, Dad's starting a new fiIm. - Bravo Dad for making films!
We can't ceIebrate with out Mom.
- Be home soon, from rehearsal. - No, she's eating out.
A man friend came to pick her up.
- A girI friend. - A man.
She shouId be back about half ten?
She didn't say.
She went out.
So what does the Caiman do with these accounts?
So as not to get found out,
he covers his tracks
with what are calIed "offshore" companies.
They beIong to nominees,
people who say they are chairmen, administrators,
who pretend the money is theirs, whiIe it's reaIly the Caiman's.
See how clever he is?
That's enough, I want stories about Aidra.
Yes, "Cataracts" is better.
Aidra's hair is black, as black as pitch.
Unrecognizable, she wants to make a fresh start...
What are you doing here?
Where's the baby-sitter?
- l sent her home, it's Iate. - Yes it is. You'd better go.
Where were you?
- At the theatre. - You didn't tell me.
They had tickets, so l went.
Who had tickets?
Friends, our friends, you know them...
So why don't they invite me anymore?
Because they know we've split up.
Yes...
Stop that!
Here he is!
Come on, Dad's here.
Just Iook at this mess.
- Four flat tires. - I'll call the garage.
One tire, ok. But aIl four, what a sick joke!
Don't worry.
- Hurry, we'lI be late for schooI. - AIready are.
- Too Iate, the beII's rung. - Stop being smart, Iet's go.
- Where are you going? - Rehearsals, l'm late.
I'Il take you, l toId Teresa l'd be Iate.
- But aII you do is rehearse! - We open in ten days.
So, Teresa, is she young?
Yes, but don't worry.
Ours is pureIy a work reIationship.
I'm not worried...
l was just wondering if she's experienced.
No, but she's talented.
You must come and visit, the sets are wonderfuI.
Just when l felt aII was going badIy
here I am doing a fiIm about Berlusconi,
with a famous actor, Marco Pulici.
- I even have the money to make it! - l'm reaIIy happy.
See how life is? A new project...
a serious, important movie, on Berlusconi!
You've had a lawyer read the script?
Not yet, but don't worry.
Yet I wouId Iike you to read it.
There's this tiny role...
l've gotto go.
- l'd Iike you to do it. - PIease, don't start.
Why not?
Yesterday, Sturovski said to me:
"Why did she give up? She was so talented!"
Remember how he used to talk?
Bruno, l've turned that page...
Coming!
Let's get serious here.
Things are better for you, no?
So organise yourself differently, for the kids.
- To spend more time with them. - Where? l sIeep at the office!
Maybe it's time you got an apartment
where the kids can bring their stuff.
I'm prepping the film, l don't have time
and anyway, I don't agree.
I have an idea, to heIp you.
With the heIp of my parents,
l could buy out your share of the apartment.
That way, you could buy a smaller one nearby.
- To heIp me, you kick me out? - lt's not like that.
MlLAN TRIBUNAL The top group managers
would come with their wives, to my home for Christmas.
And I wouId personalIy buy jeweIlery
with an attention to detail...
worthy of my perfectionism.
Thus, to each lady, using the computer,
over the years, l'd offer earrings, a braceIet,
a necklace, a brooch.
And so as not to repeat myself
l'd choose a piece of jewelIery
which would complete the whoIe,
a set of jeweIIery offered down the years.
lt's a documentary, just to get an idea.
You have to buiId a character which...
Yes, but my Caiman has to be muIti faceted, more nuanced.
Wait 'til you taste this cheese!
l was saying to Teresa
that the Caiman ought to be more nuanced.
- Do you agree? - No!
BerIusconi is self-made, he's something new...
New and totaIly negative!
We have to work on every aspect of the character.
The hero must have appeal, or the audience...
Help me, you're the producer!
He can't be purely negative, peopIe have to take to him.
When Volonte did "Investigation of a Citizen...",
the character was unpIeasant, but also...
- ComicaI. - HeII, no!
Fascinating!
What matters is to telI what this man's done to our country.
To what he has reduced your operetta Italy.
Jerzy, that'll do! Here's to "The Caiman".
What proof have you? What evidence? What testimony?
None, except the wiId imagination of judges
who have invented this plot of persecution against me!
We want an ltaIy
which gives more scope to the private, less to the State.
An Italy with more private and less State.
Less State.
Here are the buttons.
Each one corresponds to an MP, and hence a vote.
Red: against. Green: for him.
The choice of extras, not bad?
Yes, but I don't just want a crowd around the Caiman,
l want reaI people, with reaI faces.
Yes, you've told me umpteen times, but we need to decide how many.
- Bruno said nine hundred. - He did?
900 meals, 900 employer's contributions...
900 extras, that's too many!
We don't have the money.
- How do we manage them? - 900 for the whole film.
lt stilI means 100,000 euros.
These are the drawings for the house...
for the Caiman's house, welI done!
l wanted something more showy, more tacky.
But it is showy! And anyhow, film tends to...
- To amplify. - Right.
lt's better to do Iess, but weIl.
We ought to haIve everything.
HaIve the sets, by grouping certain scenes.
Halve the scheduIe,
the extras, the fiIm stock...
We don't have the money, we shouId halve everything.
l've onIy directed two shorts.
- So? - Maybe l'm not up to it.
- Everyone asking me what to do... - Are they being rude?
Maybe I'm not getting across.
I'm not abIe, l've never done it!
You're doing it now and you'Il succeed.
lt's too tough for a first film.
I shouId've done something more me.
But this is you!
Something I know better,
something closer to home.
The designer has another idea for the Caiman's house.
Later!
Please don't panic, or l wiIl too.
And no more about those shorts of yours,
or else, l'II get curious.
I'll watch them, hate them and take you off the fiIm.
Now back to work.
By the way...
on Sunday, I'm lunching at my parents in the country.
Maybe you'd like to come with your wife and kids...
We'II see, that'd be nice.
Come on, eat...
That was mine!
Eat up!
- This is Dad's new house. - Looks nice from the outside.
Good evening.
The keys, pIease.
4,567,226 euros
for 554 screens...
An average of 5,016 euros.
"War of the Worlds" is doing better than "Batman" and "StarWars IIl".
Sunday, we'lI go and see "War of the WorIds".
No, Dad, enough scary fiIms! And you aIways choose.
No, we choose together...
- Giacomo, who chooses? - You do.
And anyhow, who said it was scary?
- My friends. - Your mom!
And it's a film for grown-ups: they sex!
- They what? - They sex.
In that fiIm I don't think they reaIIy...
- Until when can I cuddle you? - Ten years.
- Ten more years... - No, when we're ten, you stop.
What a shame!
How did it go with the psychologist?
Her dinosaurs are ugly, and she has hardIy any Lego.
Why don't you reconsoIe with Mom?
"Reconcile"!
"Reconstyle".
- Learn the words! - And you shut up!
Ok, time to sleep.
- Who's better: Dida or Buffon? - I don't know.
Who's the best goalkeeper, Dida or Buffon?
Depends on the day.
- But for you, who's the best? - For me, Dida.
For me, it's Buffon.
Good night.
Are you at home?
The match?
They calIed me at the Iast minute, three other kids were sick.
Got to go, l'lI hand you over to Mom.
lt's a really big pitch.
Why didn't you calI me?
- What does he mean "big pitch"? - WelI, it's big.
Yes, I think he's a substitute.
Are you substitutes?
They don't know.
- How many a side? - Eight.
What does that mean?
Then it must be eight a side, as they're eight.
There are goaIposts aII around.
Goalposts alI around,
l don't know which they'Il choose.
No, not green, the pitch is brown,
fuIl of dust...
Like dirt, with pebbles in it.
No, l don't have the right shoes, I'm getting fiIthy.
Ah, you mean Andrea!
Yes... l think so.
No, I'm not going to ask him.
I'd be ashamed, in front of his friends.
Coach, does Andrea have the right shoes?
Yes, he's fine.
l have to get off, l'm being whistIed at!
l'm going to change Margherita.
We were expecting you with the boys, they'd love it here.
Andrea had a match he couIdn't miss.
It's the first time... he's pIayed on a big pitch.
They're pIaying eight a side, it's usualIy five.
lf you plough on a slope, the clods roIl
and damage the vines.
Depends on the slope, the earth...
But oIive trees, you onIy need water them for the first two years.
Then, you have to weed the ground...
- What's up? - Just checking the time.
- Hoeing. - That's the technicaI term.
Once we've harvested the olives...
Sorry, have to make a calI, the match is over.
Ah, these matches!
When l take them to the oiI miIl,
l always make sure that
they press my oIives immediately.
Otherwise the oil is too acidic.
So what was the finaI resuIt?
Two alI, good! The goals were his fauIt?
And I check that...
- She's asleep. - Of course, you'd just been!
What's the probIem? I just went to check.
Your anxiety ends up making me anxious.
Easy, she went just to see if she was asIeep.
l know she went "just to see if she was asIeep".
I never saw you get anxious over Margherita.
You reproach me for not doing the yo-yo Iike you?
Poor Luisa, she was just worried.
Yeah, she's a good mother, but I'm not!
And you always take her side.
Why do you do this?
Sorry, something's up here...
l'lI calI you back.
Everybody was in the know!
Your brothers, your parents...
And aIl deIighted!
Why didn't you telI me?
That you Iive with a woman! We work together!
WeIl, l never met your wife, not even today.
She didn't come due to the match,
which I missed to witness you two bickering!
"l'm this kind of mother, and you're that."
"My mom takes your side, but your mom..."
I don't even know if my son's improved.
My wife knows damn aII about footbalI!
Thank goodness.
Teresa, just imagine if I was faIling in love with you...
What an asshole l'd have Iooked!
You're in Iove with her? CarefuI, I'm jealous!
l said "imagine". Stop being smart.
- How did you have this baby? - We went to HoIland and...
Don't teIl me! l don't want to know!
It'd onIy upset me.
And l don't think I'd understand.
You'd expIain and l wouIdn't understand.
So Iet's just drop it.
This is where they'Il put the Caiman when he dies.
He dies at the end?
No, but as he's rich, he had a tomb built exactly to his Iiking.
That way, when he dies, he'II be happy.
- WelI, Giacomo? - l may Iike this fiIm.
- More than "Cataracts"? - No, that's going too far!
I'd like a word with you.
Everything ok?
The sets are wonderful!
- Family keeping weIl? - Fine.
- How many kids do you have? - Two, 9 and 7.
And how oId are they?
I just told you: 9 and 7.
l have one just entering secondary.
Puberty can be...
We were young too, we know what it's Iike...
- Having problems? - No, it's this job.
You see your kids for a week, and then not for a month.
We need to spend more time with them,
because chiIdren feeI a father's presence,
they need it, especialIy at that age.
So, one has to make choices...
We have... to be men!
Sure, but I don't see what you're getting at.
I'm sorry about the film,
for Teresa, l mean, she's got talent.
And you sure know how to choose.
Yes, she has taIent, and so?
l'm taking a year...
What's it calIed?
A year when you do nothing... a sabbatical year.
When?
Know what my son said to me?
"I switch on the TV in the hope of seeing you."
That made me think, l need to take a break.
Take a break after the film.
- You made a commitment. - l didn't sign.
And anyway, that's not the point.
- You don't want to do BerIusconi? - l've aIways been a fighter.
Allende, Vietnam, the Actor's Union...
I want to take it easy.
What about the PoIe?
Want me to taIk to him? You'd rather teIl him?
Might be better that way.
You're realIy old schooI...
You immediateIy sensed l was...
Kiss me... Be good.
You'lI find a way...
Answering machine...
But he'lI turn up, you know Marco.
Always working, from one set to another.
At the moment, he's mostIy with his kids.
Do you realize how Iucky you are!
Pulici is like a Stradivarius, the barest touch and he soars.
Let's not overpIay the actor. The fiIm's more than him.
Like you said, operetta Italy...
It needs a solid actor.
But imagine if he weren't in it,
the film would Iose a lot, yet it'd stilI have...
lt'd stilI have?
It'd have...
It'd stilI have the same punch.
I don't think so.
If he weren't in it, you wouldn't do the fiIm?
Bruno, she's a novice, it needs a famous actor...
Why are we taIking about this?
What's going on?
Teresa, I'd like a word...
PuIici's Ieft the film so Sturovski won't do it.
- Why not? - He can't.
l did what l couId.
But I don't even have the strength to return to the tabIe.
- I've got to go. - Where?
See that bIonde over there? That's my wife.
We spIit up six months ago, and that guy, I don't know him!
Get me out of here!
Why did you do this disgusting thing?
What do you want from me? You scare me!
But you don't care how the kids feel
to see their father in this shithole...
That has nothing to do with it!
I bet it was you who punctured my tires, you bastard!
Are you crazy?
And even if it were true?
Who was that guy at the restaurant?
We've separated.
The children know, everyone knows.
What do you want from me?
Nothing, I just destroyed a sweater.
It was a gift, it was beautifuI.
What do you want?
lt was a nice gift, that's why l ripped it up.
Goodbye, PaoIa.
What must I do?
Any messages?
The bank is Iooking for you, it's urgent.
Teresa was trying to get you too.
I have actors coming by.
Do l ask them to leave their photos?
I also got a calI from a festivaI, "Cinema and PsychoanaIysis".
They want a copy of "Maciste versus Freud".
- Do I send them one? - As you like.
Coming by this afternoon?
PuIici's Ieft the fiIm, Sturovski puIled out,
we're no longer making it.
What?
The whole thing's off.
But you have to make it! We have to!
A fIat yelIow!
Why can't I find that little piece?!
What did I do to you?
Good evening.
Cut!
Natives in position! Gather around Columbus!
Without shoes, please.
Then we do a dolIy shot,
but tracking very, very slowly.
Make sure they know.
This is the triumph of CoIumbus.
No one beIieved in him...
but after seven months at sea, suffering...
- Ah, l didn't know. - Seven months!
...the world is gratefuI, as thanks to you it has grown.
So, smiIe.
Where?
l said smile.
That's it, bravo!
No, the director was talking about CoIumbus's smile.
- What about the Dominican? - Take him out of shot.
We head over to Torvajanica...
have a nice pizza together.
Hey, you savages! What's that pizzeria caIled?
"Uncle Scrooge's" at Torvajanica.
l heard you, quit yelIing!
No, nothing...
An actor has to concentrate before playing a scene!
Darling, two more takes and we're done.
- Action! - lt's off.
Majesty, the joy of seeing you again is boundless
as the ocean l have just...
crossed.
Sorry, Iet's do it again.
In position, one more time!
"...spouse Bonomo, born in Rome...
domiciIed in Rome.
The parties, whose identities the notary hereby certifies,
have agreed to the folIowing..."
Everything alright?
You're sure?
- This is an important step. - We know.
"Bruno Bonomo sells, cedes and transfers his due rights
to haIf of the whole
to PaoIa Zamorani, hoIder of the remaining rights,
who thus becomes the soIe owner..."
On the forehead!
ln you go.
Dad, heIp!
Don't panic!
That's the wardrobe truck,
where the costume designer works.
And that truck has alI the electricaI equipment.
And it's you who pays all these people?
How do you do it?
Dad has enough money to telI just one day in the Iife of the Caiman.
- Which one? - The Iast day of his trial.
lt's dragged on for ages,
but today he'II be decIared guiIty or innocent.
Bruno, we're aImost ready.
What if it costs too much and you don't have the money?
Don't worry about that.
And if the fiIm doesn't work?
If it works, it works, if it doesn't...
You'Il never make another fiIm?
Giacomo!
Paolo, in position!
Bodyguards!
Bodyguards, into cars, pIease!
Over there!
Teresa, ready to shoot.
So...
Are you ready?
Everyone in position, pIease!
Off you go.
Camera.
RolIing!
Action.
A bit louder.
Action!
l wish to remind this court
that today I speak to you not simply as one accused,
but also, and above all, as a citizen,
to whom the majority of Italians
has entrusted the onus and responsibiIity to govern.
Because you do govern this country
the ltaIians have the right to know if you...
You are attacking me
as Prime Minister
and as a magistrate you cannot do that.
lf you wish to engage in poIitics, resign and get elected!
When I had cancer,
the Left gave me six months to Iive, a year at the most.
Because they thought they couId beat me in the elections,
onIy with the heIp of cancer or the judiciary.
The anomaIy is not me,
it is the Communists, and their hatred for me.
Their politicaI use of justice, that is the ltaIian anomaIy.
We cannot continue to waste public money
on a triaI based soIeIy on lies.
I am the onIy one to have governed a complete term
and l've made more reforms in five years
than the Left made in fifty.
It was not in government, but it was in power.
In the schools, the universities, the tribunals,
the newspapers, the television,
the judiciary, the Constitutional Court.
ln a statement, your administrator
admitted to the existence of slush funds
on your group's foreign bank accounts.
Do you refute such a serious charge?
I invoke my right to siIence.
How sad it is, the Left.
lt is sad and it makes peopIe sad.
But I wanted to give hope to this country.
AIas, half of the ltaIian peopIe
can no longer even hope, as alI they can do is hate.
That's aIl the Left knows how to do: hate me.
You aIlocated large sums of money
to regularly pay magistrates
to accomplish acts contrary to their duty.
They were on your payroll just like empIoyees?
Don't answer that.
l've been reminded that I am late.
The Greek President is expecting me for a key institutionaI meeting.
l had hoped that this time...
l beIong to a troika...
- Leave! - Which heads the Council of Europe.
The accused continues to evade this triaI.
Yet here, I read:
"AIl citizens are equaI before the law."
But this citizen is perhaps a bit more equaI than others,
as the majority of Italians...
the majority of ltaIians,
via free eIections, gave him a mandate to govern!
My aIIies were nobodies.
They were Fascists.
l put them in government, I made them ministers.
They were Christian democrats, beating their breasts.
I reassured them.
Then, those from the Northern League...
All of Europe was telIing me: "Careful, they are racists."
l got them to see reason, l put them in government,
even though they insuIted me and caIIed me a Mafioso.
l put them all in government.
Yet today, not one of them has caIled me.
Five years have passed since the first preIiminary hearing.
The accused has consistentIy evaded this trial.
He did not attend when summoned to do so.
He has done his utmost to pass laws
aimed at hindering this trial's conclusion.
What's at stake in this triaI,
is the very possibiIity of holding it,
so that the judiciary might fuIfil its functions
in the service of the State.
Your Honor, one Iast thing before the court retires.
l hope you are aware
that with your verdict you may change
the history of our country.
Prime Minister...
The court caIled, they are ready.
We're ready too, let's go.
Prime Minister, what verdict do you predict?
...does sentence him to seven years imprisonment,
interdiction from pubIic office,
and suspension of civic rights for the term of the sentence.
The accused is also ordered to pay alI IegaI costs.
The grounds for the decision shaIl be Iodged within sixty days.
ln a IiberaI democracy, the judges apply the Iaw.
They do not put up resistance, resistance, resistance
to him chosen by the eIectors to govern.
ln a IiberaI democracy,
he who governs may be judged only by his peers,
namely, those elected by the people.
Yet the caste of judges
wishes to have the power
to decide in the electors stead.
And l feeI the moment has come to stop them.
With my conviction,
our democracy
has become a regime.
A regime which aII free men like you
have the right to resist using every means!